Day 30

Yup today is my 30TH day of injections. So far nothing exciting to report. I have yet another scan tomorrow. Increasing my dosage has helped just not as much as we had hoped. I hope we will see some progress. If not I'm seriously thinking about calling it quits. Shawn starts school again on Monday. To say I've gotten spoiled is an understatement. Having him home at 5 has been great. He will be back to 6am to 9pm. Not real productive for baby making. So if this cycle is a bust. We will be forced to take a break until December. We hope to sneak in a cycle while he's on winter break.
I'm just feeling really defeated. This has been my longest most stressful cycle yet. I'm starting to think I just not meant to have anymore children. I got some great news today my dear sweet cousin A is pregnant again. Now she has had 3 losses. So she really deserves this. But I feel like a complete A$$. I want to be happy for her but I'm so jealous and angry. Why is it she can get pregnant so easily? Her husband is a accountant. So they were ttc so they could have a specific due date. Come on! I started this cycle hoping for a May due date and now it's June if I'm lucky. I would love nothing more than to throw a fit worthy of my two year old. Complete with throwing myself on the floor. My sweet husband just pats me on the shoulder(out of hitting range) and says "Maybe its just the hormones." After 30 days he might be right.