Crappy Day

I had a crappy day today. I had an 8:30 am appointment at my GYN for a follicle check. I hate bringing my daughter with me. It is an OB office but they try to keep the morning appointments for fertility treatments. I'm always afraid that another woman struggling with infertility will see her. Some days I would like to put I sign around her neck that says "Miracle baby, Mommy and Daddy waited five years for me." But we are keeping this cycle a secret so I don't have a choice.

Today I wanted a sign around my neck. There is only one ultrasound machine in their office. So when 9:15 had come and gone I started to worry. Not for me, but why would someone need such a long ultrasound. It was 10am before I got my ultrasound. By the time I was done getting bad news about my cycle. Riley was in a full terrible two temper tantrum, I can't blame her. As I was scheduling my next appointment Riley hit the full hysterics portion of the fit. Throwing herself on the floor in front of the exit door. Well at the same moment this young woman and her husband are quickly heading for the exit. She is openly sobbing and all I could think was " No not another one." I tried desperately to get Riley out of the way. In that moment I wanted to tell her so much. I wanted her to know she was not alone. I wanted her to know that I understand her pain. I wanted to hold her and cry with her. I stood there wishing I had bereaved mother tattooed on my forehead. All I managed was "I'm sorry." I'm sure she thought I was apologizing about my daughter being in the way. I meant so much more.

As a side note two things.

1. For the few who are following my cycle. After 21 days of injections the one and only tiny follicle I have has shrunk dramatically. So Dr. M has now agreed to up my dosage. I really hope things improve soon. I hate PCOS.

2. Anyone know the best way to get smoke damage off your kitchen walls? Yep, I set my stove on fire. No one was injured but its been a really crappy day.